jackie rhae wood

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jackie r. wood
jackie r. wood

jackie rhae wood Empty
ObjavljaNaslov sporočila: jackie rhae wood   jackie rhae wood Icon_minitimeSob Jul 26, 2014 2:29 am

jackie, 3 years, loving the forum guys!
  • 21
  • 25.12.
  • straight as hell
  • silverstram
  • jessica parker kennedy
  • medium
  • artistic
  • party animal
  • sarcastic
I simply wake up in the middle of the night, suddenly my eyes are wide open and i can't sleep. I know why i woke up, but it's just feels so natural. I got so used to it, i don't even care anymore. I just wake up. because i'm different. I've always been different. My pictures and other art pieces are unique, if i can believe the others, when most of them have no idea about art. But my inspiration comes from me. Not from nature or stuff from life and that shit other artist feed to people. If you ask me, that's just some bullshit to make people think that they could be artists too. Sometimes, i do find some inspiration in other stuff but myself, but those pieces seem so normal and average, i usually just throw them away. I sound very self-centered, but that's just the truth. I'm different. I've always been different and i don't think i can actually change that.
It all started with a dream. A nightmare, actually. I was only six years old, but i remember the dream like it was yesterday. How is it possible, you may wonder? Well, the answer is quite simple. i've had the same dream every single night since then. Nobody knows why, but instead of dreaming about hot boys in my teenage years, i dreamt the same dream. Im trapped in a circle made of fire. People, no, not people, almost monsters are walking towards me with weird shadows on their faces. Sometimes, they even seem kind of blurry. They start talking to me, completely normally. And then a light appears. A shining white tunnel of pure light. It's so beautiful, i just want to walk right in, but somehow i know that it's not meant for me. It's meant for them. But they just can't seem to notice it. they're still just talking to me, refusing to see the light and walk into it. i try to talk some sense into them, but they just won't listen. Instead, they start grabbing me and no one wants to let go. Before i can neven know what's happening, i'm the one they're pushing into the light. Away from everything, and i just feel empty, like i'm not even there. I don't belong there, but they do. I'm just trapped in that black darkness like a fish in a small fish tank. And there's no light to save me. I woke up with a scream that woke up the whole house.
I told my family about the dream, but they were sure it was just a side effect of losing my mother and one of my best friends. But even as a little kid, i knew this wasn't the reason. My mom probably had nothing to do with it, but my best friend, tyson, actually had. After he's supposed to die in the accident, i kept seeing him, but with weird shadows on his face. The others saw him too, but they were saying that i was just imagening the shadows. They put me into a hospital, they tought i went mad. Tyson visited me every day. The dreams started, when i told him i can see the shadows on his face. And not only his face, but on faces of some nurses, other patients.. i realized i'm not the only one, but because of those dreams, i knew what to do. Back then, the dreams weren't coming to me very often, but after i talked tyson into seeing and even going into the light, they've been with me every single night.
That's my punishment for not being able to send the others to the light, but that's what i've realized just a while ago. I was selfish, but the others wouldn't listen to me. I was let go from the hospital as soon as i was smart enough to keep the shadows and the dreams to myself. Nobody knew about this, even my family believed that i've stopped seeing stuff. Now, i just use them as my inspiration. Shadows on a face of a woman at the bakery, the butcher's sad look and the shadows behind him.. anyone who ever knew about my secret thinks that it's just a side effect. That i'm making fun of it for 'old time's sake' but that's a lie. I'm just a waitress/wannabe artist that has no guts to help people. I'm a coward, the freak that was locked up as a kid. And that's what i don't wanna be.
My dream is to be normal. But being normal is not an option for me. I did a little resourch. I'm a medium. And the only way to ever possibly do something wright, is to help. Offer help the ones, that don't know they need it.
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skylar grey
skylar grey

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ObjavljaNaslov sporočila: Re: jackie rhae wood   jackie rhae wood Icon_minitimeSob Jul 26, 2014 2:41 am

you have been

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